Today an old friend and I shared our 2021 goals. I just let my thoughts flow and talked naturally to him. After I had heard myself speaking for a while, I realized that I started to use the words “should”, “could”, “would”, and “must” excessively often.

It felt strange because I had worked on my reactive way of speaking in the past already. Back then, I replaced the reactive word “must” with the proactive phrase “I decide to”.

It seemed that over the year, I again had become accustomed again to talk in a reactive way of saying “must” excessively often. …

We all have goals we want to achieve. We want to get in our best shape, grow our business, write a book, or win a championship.

In his book Outwitting the Devil, Napoleon Hill points out why having goals and being ambitious is possibly one of the most powerful traits we can obtain. In his dialog with the “devil”, who is a metaphor for our bad habits and unwise way of living, the devil points out: All habits, expect striving for a clear goal, can lead to drifting. …

Have you ever read a book that delivered only one or a few core learnings in the end? Most words of that book were just side stories to underline the essential viewpoints. In the end, a book summary app like Blinkist would provide you with the same information, but in a fraction of the time.

Ok, a great story keeps us entertained. The viewpoints explained provide us with a deeper understanding, but we can translate this to our own time and energy:

We focus on side stories that don’t have the impact we want to see in our lives. …

Isn’t “to survive Christmas” already a messy attitude? Sometimes it’s ok to be in survival mode to get over a tough day. Christmas time is inevitably a part of the year. It’s a part of the 365 unique days that will never come back. Each day in survival mode should be a warning sign.

Anyway, it’s comprehensible: Isn’t everybody behaving differently on Christmas compared to the rest of the year? Everyone takes time off and is at home, we meet our families and the people we rarely see over the year (and maybe don’t really like), we buy gifts and allow ourselves not to stick to our budget, and we eat a lot of Christmas cookies when we worked on our shape in the preceding 11 months. …

The modern world provides us with countless ways of what we could do, where we could go, and how we could live.

The past wasn’t this way. Back then, there were fewer schools to go to, fewer travel options, fewer sources of know-how, fewer opportunities to design life. Life was about working hard rather than working smart. Thanks to our ancestors and their work, this has changed fundamentally.

Now, we have much more freedom to choose our path. We have many more tools and options to learn anything. We have the technology to travel to any corner of the world quickly. We can pick our profession, craft, and hobbies almost freely. …

Today, after my meditation, memories of my life in 2017 came up. Back then, I was in a toxic relationship that I tried to ignore, and I had serious health issues. I remembered how tired, weak, and shiftless I was back then and how much I have improved since taking responsibility.

I reflected on a tiny habit I formed back then after listening to advice from the monk Dandapani: To take time off from all devices, people, and work to spend time understanding myself. When I started listening to myself, it helped me profoundly to reflect on my life.

I realized it was actually during these days off that I got clear about my life and the next steps I needed to take. I formed a daily meditation practice from this experience, which still makes a huge difference in my life. …

In 2017 I started to take my life seriously. I started right away and put my life goals and expectations down on a small piece of paper. I split them into intermediate goals with an end date. I refined my list. I tried to answer the question of why I want to reach my goals.

Space on my paper ran out, so I switched to spreadsheet software.

Suddenly I had several lists of goals for the upcoming year, the next three years, the next ten years, the next 30 years. My spreadsheet was almost bursting. I tried to extrapolate almost anything I wanted to be, have, and do. …

Researchers found that cells within the human body are subject to permanent and regular regeneration. The cells of our bodies aren’t old. They keep regenerating and therefore are quite new. As we grow older, only the ratio between the generation of new cells and the degeneration of old cells varies. But regeneration continues.

Your body is as vital and young as it has always been.

To put it in other words: The only old thing you carry is your outdated thinking about your new and regenerated self.

Your mind might still carry old and destructive thinking patterns due to your conditioning. You are trained not to consciously question how to live your life, how to make a difference, and how to think for yourself. You are conditioned to perceive your life as it is right now without questioning it. …